To be Dostoevsky
What a simple woman could do for a genius?
Anna Grigorevna Snitkina entered the house of her future husband, the 44-year-old already famous writer Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky , a young, largely naive girl. He had behind his shoulders penal servitude, exile, an unhappy first marriage, the death of a spouse and a beloved brother, endless debts, the terrible physical pain of epileptic seizures, obsession with playing roulette, loneliness and, most importantly, knowing life from its most unsightly side. She was also a cheerful young woman, brought up in a warm and carefree way, she did not even know how to do business. But the depth and strength of personality, which she modestly did not mark in herself, managed to notice Dostoevsky.
Their hasty marriage could easily end in a quick disappointment. But it was he who brought the famous writer that great happiness that he had never known before. It was in these last 14 years of his life that he wrote the strongest and most famous of his works. "You are the only woman who understood me," he would repeat to Ana, and it was she who dedicated her last, brilliant novel, The Brothers Karamazov . What kind of marriage was this? How did the fragile, inexperienced girl manage to make the genius happy, who, it seems, felt all the evil in life and became a great preacher of the Light?
"There was no happiness. I'm waiting for him "
At the beginning of the 20th century, recalling a meeting with Anna Dostoyevsky's widow Anna Grigorievna, the Russian actor Leonid Leonidov (he played Dmitry Karamazov in the production of The Brothers Karamazov in 1910 in the Moscow Art Theater) wrote: "I saw and heard something, but through this "something", through this ten-minute meeting, through his widow, I felt Dostoevsky: a hundred books about Dostoevsky would not have given me as much as this meeting! "
Everyone knows the expression "beauty will save the world", which is attributed to Dostoevsky. Meanwhile, Fyodor Mikhailovich never believed that the world would be saved by beauty. At least that any beauty is salutary. And the replica of one of the heroes of the novel "Idiot" can not in any way confirm the opposite. The truth is in another: for Dostoevsky, the question of beauty really was the main issue of life and creativity.
noticed: their inequality in age - and between the spouses was almost no less than a quarter of a century of difference - the inequality of their life experience could lead to one of two opposite options: "Or, after suffering for several years, we will part, or live happily for life". And judging by the fact that Fyodor Mikhailovich with astonishment and admiration wrote on the 12th year of marriage that he was still madly in love with his Anya, their life really turned out to be very happy. However, she was not easy from the very beginning: the marriage of Anna Grigorievna and Fyodor Mikhailovich passed the test of poverty, illness, the death of children, all Dostoevsky's relatives rebelled against him. And, probably, helped him to resist, including the fact that the couple "looked the same way", being educated in some values ...
Anna Grigoryevna was born on August 30, 1846 in the family of a small official Grigory Ivanovich Snitkin. Together with the old mother and four brothers, one of whom was also married and had children, Grigory Ivanovich and his family lived in a large apartment of 11 rooms. Anna Grigoryevna recalled that in their large family there was a friendly atmosphere, she did not know any quarrels, clarification of relations with relatives, and thought that this was the case in any family. Anna Grigoryevna's mother - Anna Nikolaevna Snitkina Miltopeus) - was a Swede of Finnish origin, and by faith - a Lutheran. Meeting her future husband put her before a serious choice: marriage with a loved one or loyalty to the Lutheran faith. She prayed a lot about solving this dilemma. And one day she saw a dream: she enters an Orthodox church, kneels in front of the shroud and prays there. Anna Nikolaevna considered this as a sign - and agreed to accept Orthodoxy. Imagine her surprise when, when she came to perform the anointing ceremony at the Simeonovskaya Church on Mokhovaya Street, she saw that very shroud and exactly the atmosphere that she had dreamed of!
Since then, Anna Nikolaevna Snitkina lived a church life, confessed and communion. The fad of her daughter Netochka from the early years was Protopriest Philip Speransky. And being a teenager of 13 years, resting in Pskov, the young Anya suddenly decided to go to the monastery. Parents managed to get her back to St. Petersburg, although they went to the trick: they told her that his father was seriously ill ...
In the family of Dostoevsky, as he later expressed in the Diary of the Writer, "the Gospel was known almost from the first childhood." His father, Mikhail Andreevich, was the doctor of the Mariinsky Hospital for the Poor, so that the fate of those whom the writer later made heroes of his works unfolded before his eyes - he learned from childhood, compassion, although his father's character was strangely mixed with generosity and gloominess, . Dostoevsky's mother, Maria Feodorovna, whom he loved and respected immensely, was a man of rare kindness and sensitivity. And she died like a real righteous man: before her death she suddenly came "in perfect memory, demanded the icon of the Savior, and first blessed all" loved ones, "giving barely audible blessings and instructions."
In Ana Snitkina, Dostoevsky saw the same kind, sensitive, compassionate heart ... And suddenly he felt: "with me she can be happy." That's right: she can be happy, not me.
Did he think about his happiness? Like any man, I thought. He spoke to friends and hoped that after all the hardships of life and at the age that the generation of his parents considered to be old age, after all he would stick to a quiet harbor, he would be happy in the family. "There was no happiness. I'm waiting for him, "he said, already tired of life.
"It is good that you are not a man"
As often happens, at the time of finding this happiness in the fate of both, there were tragic, crucial events. In the spring of 1866, after a long illness, Anna's father dies. A year before, the doctors had announced that Grigory Ivanovich was ill without treatment, and there was no hope of an amendment, then she had to leave the Pedagogical Gymnasium in order to visit her father more. At the beginning of 1866 stenographic courses were opened in St. Petersburg, they allowed to combine education and care for the parent - and Anna Grigorievna, at his insistence, enrolled in the course. But after 5-6 lectures I returned home in despair: "gibberish" was a very difficult task. It was Grigory Ivanovich who was indignant at the lack of patience and perseverance in his daughter and took the floor from her that she would finish the courses. If only he knew how fateful this promise will be!
What was happening at that time in Dostoevsky's life? By that time he was quite famous - in the same house Snitkin read all of his works. Already his first story "Poor People", written in 1845, caused the most praiseworthy praise of critics. But then there was the wall of negative reviews that fell on his subsequent works, there was katorga, the death from the tuberculosis of his first wife, the sudden death of his beloved brother, an entrepreneur whose promissory notes - imaginary and real - Fedor Mikhailovich took over ...
By the time of the meeting with Anna, he also kept his already grown-up, 21-year-old stepson (the son of Maria Dmitrievna's first wife), as well as the family of Mikhail's deceased brother, and helped the younger brother Nikolai ... As he later confessed, "he lived all his life in a gripe ".
And at the end of the summer of 1866 the genius of literature had to conclude a bonded contract with its publisher Stellovsky: cunning and enterprising, this man pledged to publish for 3000 rubles a complete collection of works by Fyodor Mikhailovich, provided that he, before November 1, 1866, wrote a full-fledged big novel . With the delay for a month Dostoevsky will be obliged to pay a large penalty, and if he does not have time to hand over the novel before December 1 - the rights to all his works for 9 years pass to Stellovsky, the writer is deprived of interest from publications. In essence, this meant dooming to a debt prison and poverty. As Anna Grigoryevna wrote in Memoirs, Stellovsky "was able to trap people in hard times and catch them in their networks."
The novel "Demons". Manuscript
The very thought of having to write a new full-fledged novel in such a short time allowed Fyodor Mikhailovich to be discouraged-after all, the writer had not yet completed his work on "Crime and Punishment," the first parts of which were already in print-they had to be finished. And not fulfilling the conditions of Stellovsky, he risked losing everything, and this prospect seemed much more real than the opportunity to put the publisher ready for the rest of the time on the table.
As Dostoyevsky later admitted, in these circumstances Anna Grigorievna became the first person to help him with the deed, not only with the word: friends and relatives sighed and sighed, lamented and sympathized, gave advice, but no one entered his almost hopeless situation. In addition to the girl, a recent graduate of stenographic courses, virtually no work experience, which suddenly appeared in the doorway of his apartment. She, as the best graduate, was recommended by the founder of the Olkhin courses.
"It's good that you are not a man," Dostoevsky said after his first brief acquaintance and "pen test."
"Because a man would probably drink." You do not smoke, do you? ..
Good and Unhappy
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"And who loves Dostoevsky?" Worship him, you can, respect, be shocked, but love? "These words from the diary of the remarkable Soviet writer V. Konetsky for many years were consonant with my attitude to the work of Fyodor Mikhailovich. Until a year ago, after a twenty-year break, I finally did not want to reread the novel "Idiot." And after reading it, suddenly realized with surprise that I - I love Dostoevsky.
There she was met by a man tired of life, morbidly looking, glum, distracted, irritable: he could not remember her name, then, having dictated too quickly a few lines, grumbled that she did not keep up, then said that nothing of this venture was will come out.
At the same time, Dostoevsky placed Anna Grigorievna to herself with her sincerity, openness and trustfulness. In that first meeting, he told the most, perhaps, incredible episode of his life - he later described in detail in the novel "The Idiot." This is the moment when Dostoevsky was arrested for his connection with the political circle of Petrashevists, sentenced to be shot and brought to the scaffold ...
"I remember," he said, "how he stood on Semenovsky's parade ground among the condemned comrades and, seeing the preparations, knew that I had only five minutes to live. But these minutes seemed to me for years, dozens of years, so it seemed that I had to live long! We already wore death shirts and divided them into three, I was the eighth, in the third row. The first three were tied to posts. In two or three minutes, both series would have been shot, and then our turn would have come. How I longed to live, O Lord my God! As the road seemed life, how much good, good I could do! I remembered all my past, not quite good use of it, and so I wanted to try everything again and live for a long, long time ... Suddenly I heard a sound, and I cheered. My friends were untied from the pillars, brought back and read a new verdict: I was sentenced to four years in hard labor. I do not remember another such happy day! I walked around my casemate in Alekseevsky Ravelin and sang everything, sang loudly, was so glad to be given my life! "
Coming out of the writer, Snitkina made a painful impression with her. It was the weight of not disappointment, but compassion.
"For the first time in my life," she writes later, "I saw a smart man, kind, but unhappy and abandoned by all" ...
And that sullenness, unsociability, dissatisfaction, which were on the surface, did not cover the depths of his personality from her sensitive heart. Later Dostoevsky wrote to his wife:
"You usually see me, Anya, morose, cloudy and capricious; it's just outside; this is how I have always been, broken and spoiled by fate; inside is another, believe me, believe me! "
And she not only believed, but also was surprised: how could people see in her husband gloominess when he "is kind, generous, unselfish, delicate, compassionate - like no one!"
The future spouses were to spend 26 days working together on the novel "The Gambler", in which Fyodor Mikhailovich described his passion for roulette and the painful passion for a very real person - Apollinaria Suslova, an infernal woman, as the writer himself said about her. However, this passion for the game, which Fyodor Mikhailovich could not win for many years, disappeared as suddenly as it appeared, thanks to the extraordinary patience and extraordinary wisdom of his young wife.
So Anna Grigorevna Snitkina shorthanded the novel, at home, often at night, copied it in ordinary language and brought to the house of Fyodor Mikhailovich. Slowly he himself began to believe that everything would turn out. And by October 30, 1866, the manuscript was ready!
Dostoevsky's study in the last Petersburg apartment
But when the writer came with a ready-made novel to the publisher, it turned out that he ... went to the province and it's not known when he will return! The servant did not agree to accept the manuscript in his absence. The head of the publisher's office also refused to accept the manuscript. It was meanness, but the meanness expected. With her usual energy, Anna Grigoryevna joined the case - she asked her mother to consult a lawyer, and he ordered Dostoevsky to take the work to the notary, assure him of his arrival. But to the notary Fyodor Mikhailovich ... late! However, he nevertheless assured his work - in the management of the quarter against receipt. And he was saved from collapse.
By the way, we note that Stellovsky, whose name was associated not just a scandal and not one villainy in the fate of writers and musicians, ended his days sadly: he died in a psychiatric hospital, before reaching 50 years.
So, the "Gambler" is over, the stone fell off his shoulders, but Dostoevsky understands that he can not part with his young assistant ... And after a short break he offers to continue work - on "Crime and Punishment". Anna Grigoryevna also sees a change in herself: all her thoughts are about Dostoevsky, her former interests, friends, entertainments grow dim, she wants to be near him.
Their explanation takes place in an unusual form. Fyodor Mikhailovich, as it were, tells the story of a novel he conceived, where an elderly, visionary artist falls in love with a young girl ... "Put yourself in for a moment," he said in a trembling voice. - Imagine that this artist is me, that I confessed to you in love and asked to be my wife. Tell me, what would you answer me? "-
"I would tell you that I love you and will love my whole life!"
On February 15, 1867, Anna Grigorevna Snitkina and Fyodor Mikhailovich Dostoevsky were crowned. She is 20, he is 45. "God gave her to me" - more than once the writer will say about his second wife. True, for her, this first year was a year of both happiness and hard getting rid of illusions. She entered the house of the famous writer, Dostoevsky's "heart", which she admired at times, even too much, calling him her idol, but the real life roughly "pulled" her from these blessed skies to hard ground ...
"She loved me infinitely, I loved her too, without measure, but we did not live happily with her ..." Dostoevsky said of his first marriage with Maria Isaeva. And indeed, the first marriage of the writer, lasting 7 years, almost from the very beginning was unhappy: they were with their wife, who had a very strange character, in fact, and did not live together. How did Anna Grigorievna manage to make Dostoevsky's happiness?
After the death of her husband, in conversation with Leo Tolstoy , she spoke (though not about herself - about her husband): "Nowhere is the character of a man expressed in the ordinary life, in his family". Here, in the family, at home, and her kind, wise heart ...
After a serene and peaceful home environment, Snitkin, now Dostoyevskaya, entered the house where she was forced to live under the same roof with the erratic, dishonorable and pampered stepchild of Fyodor Mikhailovich Pavel. The 21-year-old was constantly complaining to his stepfather about his daughter-in-law, and, remaining alone with her, tried to hurt the young woman more painfully. I reproached her with the inability to conduct business, the anxiety that she gives to an already painful father, and he constantly demanded money for his maintenance.
Anna Dostoyevskaya. 1863
"This stepson is mine," admitted Fyodor Mikhailovich, "a kind, honest boy; but, unhappily, with a surprising character: he positively gave himself the word, from childhood, to do nothing without having the slightest state and having thus the most ridiculous notions of life. "
And other relatives kept up with Dostoevsky arrogantly. Soon she noticed: as soon as Fyodor Mikhailovich receives an advance for the book, from nowhere, the widow of his brother Michael, Emilia Fyodorovna, or the younger unemployed brother Nicholas is announced, or Paul has "urgent" needs - for example, the need to buy a new coat instead of the old one, out of fashion.
One winter, Dostoevsky returned home without a fur coat - gave it as a deposit to give Emily 50 rubles, which they urgently needed ... The relatives enjoyed the kindness and reliability of the writer, things vanished from the house - a Chinese vase given by friends, then a fur coat, then silver appliances: everything had to be pawned. So Anna Grigorevna faced the need to live in debt, and to live very modestly. And calmly, courageously this necessity has accepted.
Another severe test was the writer's illness. Dostoyevskaya knew about it from the first day of their acquaintance, but she hoped that the health of Fedor Mikhailovich would improve with a joyful change of life. And for the first time the attack occurred when the young couple were visiting: "Fyodor Mikhailovich was extremely lively and told something interesting to my sister. Suddenly he interrupted his speech in mid-sentence, turned pale, rose from the sofa and began to bend over to me. I looked with amazement at his changed face. But suddenly there was a terrible, inhuman scream, or rather a cry, and Fyodor Mikhailovich began to lean forward. <...> Subsequently, I heard dozens of times this "inhuman" cry, common in epileptics at the beginning of an attack. And this scream always shook me and frightened me. <...>
House of the Dostoevsky in Staraya Russa. Photo by V. Kuznetsov. 1881
Then I saw for the first time what kind of terrible illness Fedor Mikhailovich was suffering. Hearing his screams and groans that continued for hours, seeing distorted from suffering, a completely unlike face, insanely stunned eyes, completely unaware of his incoherent speech, I was almost convinced that my dear, beloved husband was going crazy, and what a horror he was making on me this thought! "She hoped that with the marriage of his attacks will occur less often. But they continued ... She hoped that at least on the honeymoon there would be time to be alone, to talk, to enjoy each other's company, but all her free time was occupied by the guests, Dostoevsky's relatives, whom she had to entertain and entertain, and the writer himself was constantly busy.
The young wife is sad about her former life, quiet and domestic, where there was no place for emotions, melancholy, clashes. It is sad about the short time between the engagement and the wedding, when they spent Dostoevsky's evening together, waiting for the fulfillment of their happiness ... And it was not in a hurry to perform.
"Why does he, the" great heart ", do not see how hard it is for me to live?"
She asked herself. Her thoughts tormented him: he stopped loving her, saw how much lower it was in spiritual and intellectual development (which, of course, was far from the truth). Anna Grigoryevna thought about the divorce, thought about the fact that if she ceased to be interested in her beloved husband, then she will not have the humility to stay with him - she will have to leave: "Too many hopes for happiness were entrusted to me for an alliance with Fedor Mikhailovich and it was bitter if only this golden dream had not come true! "
Once there is some next misunderstanding, Anna Grigorievna can not stand it, she sobs and can not calm down, and in such a state Fyodor Mikhailovich finds her. Finally, all her secret doubts go out - and the couple decide to leave. First to Moscow, then - abroad. This was in the spring of 1867. Return to their homeland Dostoevsky only after 4 years.
Save the marriage
Although Dostoyevskaya constantly stressed that she was quite a child, getting married, she quickly adapted to taking care of the family "treasury." Its main task was to provide her husband peace and the opportunity to engage in creativity. He worked at night. Writing was for Fyodor Mikhailovich not only a vocation, but also the only earnings: not having a fortune like Tolstoy or Goncharov, for example, he had to write all his works (except the first story) hastily, hurriedly, to order, otherwise it would not survive ...
Clever and energetic, Anna Grigorevna took upon herself the dealings with creditors, the analysis of debt receipts, guarding her husband from all these worries. And I took the risk - I laid down my considerable dowry to go abroad and "save my happiness."
She was sure that only
"Constant spiritual communication with her husband will be able to create that strong and united family, about which we dreamed."
By the way, it was her efforts that helped to reveal the fictitiousness of Dostoevsky's many debts. Despite the vast experience in life, it was so trusting, honest, conscientious, not adapted to life, that he believed everyone who came to him for money. After the death of his brother Mikhail, who also owned a tobacco factory, people began to appear to Fyodor Mikhaylovich, demanding the return of money that their brother owed them. Among them there were many rascals who decided to cash in on the simplicity of the writer. He did not demand confirmation from anyone, paper, he believed everybody. Anna Grigorievna took all this upon herself. It remains only to guess how much wisdom, patience and work required such activity.
Anna Dostoyevskaya. 1867
In Dostoevsky's "Memoirs," Dostoyevskaya admits: "A bitter feeling rises in me when I remember how this foreign debt spoiled my personal life ... All of my life at that time was marred by constant reflections about where to get so much money to such a number; where and for how much to lay such a thing; how to do so that Fyodor Mikhailovich did not learn about the visit of the creditor or about the mortgage of any thing. My youth fell on it, my health suffered and my nerves were upset. " She wisely protected him and her own emotions: when she wanted to cry, she went to another room, tried never to complain - neither to health (rather weak) nor to experience, to always encourage him. Assuming compliance is a necessary condition for a happy marriage, Dostoevsky's wife possessed this rare property in full. Even in those moments,
Roulette was a terrible disaster. The great writer was sick with it. He dreamed of winning for the sake of tearing his family out of debt bondage. This "fantasy" owned him completely, and one he could not find the strength to escape from her clutches ... If not for an unprecedented endurance, love for her husband and the absence of any self-gratification of Anna Grigoryevna.
"It was painful to me to see how Fyodor Mikhailovich suffered," she wrote. - He came back from the roulette pale, emaciated, barely standing on his feet, asked me for money (he gave all the money to me), left and in half an hour returned even more upset, with money, and this until he lost everything that we have. "
And what about Dostoevsky? She understood that it was not a matter of weak will, that this was a real disease, an all-consuming passion. And she never rebuked him, did not quarrel with him, did not contradict his requests to give money for the game.
Dostoevsky on his knees asked for her forgiveness, sobbed, promised to give up the fatal passion ... and again returned to her. Anna Grigorevna at such moments ... no, she did not say anything meaningly: she tried to convince her husband that everything would be fine, that she was happy, distracted him by walking or reading newspapers. And Dostoyevsky calmed down ...
When in 1871 Fyodor Mikhailovich wrote that he was throwing a tape measure, his wife did not believe it. But he did not really return to the game: "Now yours, your inseparably, all yours. Until now, half of this accursed fantasy belonged. "
For a myriad of families, the loss of a child becomes a fatal test. Dostoevsky, however, this terrible tragedy, experienced twice in 14 years of their marriage, only rallied. For the first time, with a grieving grief, the family collided in the first year of marriage, when Sonechka's daughter, having lived only 3 months, suddenly died of an ordinary cold. Her grief Anna Grigorevna describes sparingly, she, with her selfless dedication, was thinking about something else - "I was terribly afraid for my poor husband". Fyodor Mikhailovich, according to her recollections, "sobbed and cried like a woman, standing before the cooled body of her favorite, and covered her pale face and hands with hot kisses. I never saw such desperate despair again. "
A year later my second daughter was born, Love. And Dostoyevskaya, who feared that her husband could never love another child, noticed that the joy of fatherhood eclipsed all previous experiences. In a letter to a critic, Fyodor Mikhailovich claimed that a happy family life and the birth of children are three-fourths of the happiness that a person can experience on earth.
In general, his relationship with children was unique. Like no one else, he knew how to write "enter a child's worldview," understand the child, carry him away with conversation, and was at such moments himself as a child. Abroad, Fyodor Mikhailovich writes the novel "The Idiot" , and already in the homeland he finishes the novel "The Possessed." But living away from Russia was a difficult test for the couple, and in 1871 they returned to their homeland.
Eight days after returning to St. Petersburg, the son of Fyodor is born in the family, and in 1875 - another son, Alyosha, named after the righteous Alexy, the holy man of God, whom Fyodor Mikhailovich revered. This is the year when the magazine Otechestvennye Zapiski publishes the fourth great novel of Dostoevsky, The Adolescent * (the concept of the "Great Five Books of Dostoevsky", which became popular due to critics, includes five novels by the writer: Crime and Punishment, Idiot, Teenager, "The demons," "The Brothers Karamazov." - Ed.).
Anna Dostoyevskaya with her children Fedor and Anyone
But the family again realizes misfortune. Alyosha's son inherited epilepsy from his father, and her first attack, which happened to the boy at the age of three, was fatal for him ... This time the spouses seemed to switch places. Unhappy Anna Grigorievna, a woman unusually strong, still could not cope with this grief, lost interest in life, towards other children, than frightened her husband. He spoke with her, urged him to submit to the will of God, to live on. This year the writer went to Optina deserts and twice met alone with the elder Amvrosi , who gave Dostoyevsky his blessing and the words that the writer will later put into the mouth of his hero, the elder Zosima, in the Brothers Karamazov: "Rachel cries for her children and can not be comforted, because they are not there," and such, to you, mothers, the limit on earth is laid. And do not be consoled, and do not be comforted, do not be comforted and cry, only every time you cry, remember steadily that your little son is one from the angels of God - from there he looks at you and sees you, and rejoices at your tears, and they are pointed out to the Lord God. And for a long time you will still have this great mourning crying, but at the end you will return to a quiet joy, and your bitter tears will be only tears of quiet affection and a heartfelt purification, from the sins of the rescuer. "
What could he find in me?
His last and, in the opinion of many critics, Dostoevsky wrote the strongest novel The Brothers Karamazov from the spring of 1878 to the year 1880. He devotes it to his beloved wife, Anna Grigorievna ...
"Anka, my angel, all mine, alpha and omega! Ah, so you see me in a dream and, "waking up, you long for me that I'm not." It's terrible as well, and I love it. Forgive me, my angel, long for me in all respects-that means you love. This is sweeter than honey for me. I'll come and kiss you »; "But how will I live without you and without children this time? No joke, as long as 12 days "
- these lines from Dostoevsky's letters of 1875-1976, the days when he left for business in Petersburg, and the family stayed at the dacha in Staraya Russa. They do not require comments.
The family became for him a quiet harbor, and to his wife, by his own admission, he many times literally fell in love anew. Anna Grigoryevna could not truly understand for the rest of her life what Dostoevsky himself had found in it: "For all my life it seemed to me a kind of enigmatic circumstance that my good husband not only loved and respected me, as many husbands love and respect their wives, but almost bowed before me, as if I was some kind of special being, just for him created, and this is not only in the first time of marriage, but also in all other years until his death. But in fact, I did not differ in beauty, did not possess either talents or special intellectual development, and education was secondary (gymnasium). And yet, in spite of this, she earned a deep respect and almost worship from such an intelligent and talented person. "
Of course, she was not an ordinary person, such a simple thing, which the genius loved for no reason at all. Fyodor Mikhailovich and fell in love with his stenographer, feeling in it not only compassionate and kind, but also active, strong-willed, noble character, rich inner peace and art to be a real woman, with dignity remaining in the shadow of her husband, while at the same time, without exaggeration, his the main inspiration.
And although Anna Grigoryevna and Fyodor Mikhailovich really did not "match the characters", as now it is customary to say, but she admitted that she could always rely on him, and he - rely on her delicacy and care, and trusted her completely, which also sometimes surprised Anna Grigorievna. "Not the least bit, not forging and falsifying each other, and not getting involved in my soul - I'm into his psychology, he's into mine, and so my good husband and I - we both felt like a free soul ... This relationship with both parties and gave us both the opportunity to live all fourteen years of our marriage life in the happiness that is possible for people on earth. "
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She did not reproach him for impracticality and gullibility. Anna Grigoryevna recalled that her husband could not refuse anyone help. If he did not have any little things, he could bring the beggar home and give him money there. "Then these visitors began to come by themselves and, having learned the name of the husband thanks to the nailed plate, began to ask Fedor Mikhailovich. Of course, I left; they told me about their misfortunes, and I gave them cents thirty-forty. Although we are not particularly rich people, we can always provide such assistance, "she said.
And although the religiosity did not prevent the couple for some reason, perhaps out of curiosity, to go someday to some fortuneteller (who, by the way, predicted the death of their son Alyosha), nevertheless the Gospel always accompanied their life. Dostoyevskaya recalled how, when putting the children to bed , Fyodor Mikhailovich, along with them, read the prayer "Our Father", "Theotokos Devo" and his beloved - "All my trust in thee, I lay, Mother of God, keep me under your roof" ...
"Do not hold back"
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About the last days of Dostoevsky's life there is a simple truthful story of his faithful, beloved wife Anna Grigoryevna.
On the night of January 26, 1881, the writer's throat went blood (still with hard labor, he suffered from emphysema of the lungs). During the day, bleeding repeated, but Fyodor Mikhailovich calmed his wife and entertained the children, so that they would not be frightened. During the doctor's examination, the bleeding was such a force that Dostoevsky lost consciousness. When he came to, he asked his wife to invite a priest for confession and communion. I confessed for a long time. And in the morning, every other day, he said to his wife: "You know, Anya, I have not slept for about three hours and I'm still thinking, and only now I realized that I'm going to die today." He asked him to give him the Gospel, presented on the way to exile by the wives of the Decembrists, and opened at random: "But John kept him and said: I need to be baptized from you, and do you come to me? But Jesus answered and said unto him, Restrain not, for thus it is fitting for us to fulfill all righteousness. "
"You hear," he told his wife. "Do not hold back" means I will die. "
Anna Grigorievna recalled : "I could not help crying. Fyodor Mikhailovich began to console me, he told me sweet, kind words, thanked me for the happy life he had lived with me. He entrusted me children, said that he believes in me and hopes that I will always love and cherish them. Then he told me the words that a rare one of the husbands could say to his wife after fourteen years of marriage life:
- Remember, Anya, I have always loved you and never betrayed you, not even mentally! "
Postscript length of 37 years
All her life, Anna Grigorievna Dostoevskaya devoted her husband's books to the re-edition. And her "Memoirs" was written only for the purpose to shed light on the real face of the writer, who was already distorted by the versions of his contemporaries. She was only 34 years old, but there could be no question of another marriage. "And for whom can you go after Dostoevsky? She joked. - Is it for Tolstoy! »And seriously she wrote:
"I gave myself to Fyodor Mikhailovich when I was 20 years old. Now I'm over 70, and I still only belong to him every thought, every action. "
All her life Anna Grigorievna collected everything that concerns Dostoevsky, and in 1899 she transferred more than 1000 titles to the repository under the Historical Museum for the creation of the museum. Published in 1906, "Bibliographic index of works and works of art relating to the life and work of FM Dostoevsky." Opened in Staraya Russa, where they often lived in the country, the church school named after Dostoevsky for children from poor peasant families, with a hostel. In the last year already seriously ill, hungry in the war-torn Crimea. Anna Grigoryevna died in Yalta on June 22, 1918, and in half a century her ashes were moved to the Alexander Nevsky Lavra, where Fedor Mikhailovich was buried.
Anna Grigorievna with grandchildren Andrey and Fedor. This picture Anna Grigoryevna signed for the writer's nephew
Maybe someone will be embarrassed by the complete forgetfulness of self and the admiration with which Dostoyevskaya treated her husband, who filled her whole life without a trace. But who knows, could it be otherwise? Could someone less self-sacrificing endure the burden of trials that accompanied Fedor Mikhailovich? And is it surprising that next to the great writer was a truly great woman?
"Many Russian writers would feel better if they had such wives as Dostoevsky,
- said Leo Tolstoy after meeting with her. How did she manage? .. If Anna Grigorievna Dostoevsky were asked to tell about the recipe for a happy marriage with a great writer, they could surely be served by such words: "It is necessary to handle with care that it does not break. There is nothing more precious in life than love. It is more forgiving to look for the guilt in oneself and to smooth out the roughness in oneself "...
Thank you for the materials provided. F. M. Dostoyevsky's Literary and Memorial Museum in St. Petersburg.